It was one of those last minute day trips where you look at each other across the living room and say "do you want to just go for it?" and the very next second you are scooping up small shoes and wiggling them onto little feet and gathering up armfuls of jackets and snacks and milk and diapers and driving south- nodding your head to good music.
The Natural History Museum in Norman, Oklahoma- where the bones of old dinosaurs cause an almost 5-year-old boy to squeal with fits of joy and delight.
As I wandered through the clean, warm rooms and looked at these giant bone puzzles I couldn't help but be reminded of the steady pattern of life and death- racing along like a loaded freight train. Completely unstoppable. Yet here we are... often trying desperately to feel like we have control over the past, present, future... building up bones and chasing fountains of youth until our pockets are empty and we've wasted huge chunks of our life on being terrified of death.
Mind boggling, that.
UGH, to live like there was no tomorrow! That is the desire of my heart! To RUN and not walk towards my neighbors, towards those most desperate for love! To LET GO of the wall I am hugging and step out into the vulnerable open space! To live in a way that I would be proud to see my boys emulate with their own lives!
I feel so far from these things. The thought of them somehow brings feelings of both hopeful longing and defeat. How much have I already missed out on by living the way I have been living? Has too much passed me by to even bother trying now? Have I missed it completely? These are the thoughts I find in my head.
This morning in church, we talked about the book of Ezekiel.
God says in Ezekiel that He will open our graves and bring us up from them, that He will put His Spirit in us so that we may live, that He will remove our hearts of stone and replace them with hearts of flesh that beat. That POUND. That THWUMP! He speaks of calling out to a valley of dry bones- causing them to be wrapped in life and flesh once more... a second chance army... called into true life! Not just glued together bone puzzles in sterile museums for collecting dust, but LIFE that dances and hollers and brings glory to Him from all who look upon it!
We are never too far away for hope to reach us. Hope always has longer arms.
We are never too old or too burdened to start a new chapter in our stories.
Every morning is a new day. A new chance. A new grace. A fresh start. A clean page.
All we have to do is wake up, open our eyes, swing our feet onto the floor, and start saying 'yes' to the still soft voice in our hearts. Yes yes yes yes yes. Yes I want a new heart. Yes I believe in you. Yes I will cook for my elderly neighbor. Yes I will speak lovingly to my children. Yes I will read Your words. Yes I will go to Africa. Yes yes yes yes yes...
Oh! He is a 'yes' worthy God!
Yes yes yes yes yes!