September 13, 2012


Today is the first day that feels like Fall, which just happened to coincide with a Thursday, when I have absolutely NO KIDS with me from the hours of 9:30-2:30. So far, I have dawdled long in a coffee shop and then the rain chased me home. I could see it in the rearview mirror all the way up the long straight road. When I got home, I flung open the windows and ran out to swing in the hammock- all goosebumps and smiles, as everything darkened around me. The trees were swaying and the barn was creaking and all the yellow leaves started twirling down around me, like snowflakes.

I'm living these days really trying to weigh down my moments with my full attention, counting gratitudes again and marveling at the skies. I want to view each moment of my day as a pearl to string. I want to stoop and pick each one up, rather than running full boar over top of them on my way to the next thing. Yesterday I was in bed, sick, all day long, but the fact that I got to lay in bed for 24 hours MORE than made up for the puking that had to come before it. haha. Only a mama of a gaggle of young ones could be truly GRATEFUL for being picked to have a 24hour stomach flu. I counted it. It was the 666th thing I've been grateful for since I started documenting them all sometime last year. (How appropriate.)

I started a new weekly bible study on Tuesday mornings that will be going through the book of genesis over the next 32 weeks. I loved the way the sweet elderly woman who spoke on the book said that genesis was much like the most important piece of a puzzle... not the corner pieces or the middle pieces, but the picture on the top of the box. The whole rest of the Bible makes sense and finds a place when viewed through the book of genesis. I'm excited to dig into a study again, chewing on words slowly and learning about the fathers of my faith- the giants who were nothing more than regular joes like me. Oh, and the free childcare doesn't hurt one little bit bit either. ;)

An older woman at my church approached me and said she wanted to offer to help me with the boys one day a week- watching them for a little while so that I could grocery shop or clean or just even... take a shower. The kindness of it overwhelms me to tears, and even though everything in me rebels at the thought of accepting such a gracious and free offer, I can feel God asking me to just receive it. In my receiving, I will be blessed, but so also will she! This is what the church does for one another... we see a need (was it the haggard look in my eye week after week that she noticed?) and we sacrifice our time and go out of the way to bear one another's burdens. We give up comforts and we offer (with joy and gladness, without any shadow of hesitation or reserve!) to come alongside and partner in life's difficult seasons. In fact, we insist upon it! We don't take no for an answer! We call and knock on doors and hunt down the needy and give of ourselves in practical ways. We bless and we receive. One will not work without the other, and so I open my hands wide. This season of three young boys has been beyond difficult, and many times I have felt squashed by the weight of it all, the daily monotony, the backbreaking effort it takes just to leave the house, but this kind gesture from a sweet woman at my church does much to bolster my morale and give fresh hope that I will indeed make it through.

I have a strong community around me that will never let me fall. They have my back, and I've got theirs. We serve a strong God.  Of what shall I be afraid?