September 6, 2007
In Which I Vent.
Today has been a rough day, which (I am glad to say) is the first in a very long time. Ezra has been extremely whiny and sensitive- if I even look at him the wrong way, he starts wailing and crying and flailing on the ground. He's been clingy too, not wanting to let me out of his sight all. day. long.
He has been sticking his fingers in his mouth NON STOP the last few days, and I'm worried that his teeth are bothering him. They don't seem to hurt him when he eats or anything, but why else would he be sticking his fingers in there? I don't think he's teething because I'm pretty sure he's had all of his teeth for quite some time now, but what do I know? I look in his mouth and see... um, some teeth. There's hardly enough time to COUNT how many are in there, because Ezra can only sit still for like 4 milliseconds.
I took him to the store earlier today with my neighbor and her daughter, and he was doing fine until we let the kids play with the train tables they had in the store. Ezra is usually SO good at sharing and playing well with other kids, but today he was freaking out the whole time and getting really possessive about the toys. I told him if he couldn't play nicely, we were going to have to leave. He continued to flip out, so I stuck him back in the cart to go home and he was crying so hard he started to cough like he might throw up. I was trying to calm him down, but he just wouldn't stop. I was poking around in his mouth to see if I could see any teeth that might be bothering him, and he bit down on my thumbnail so hard that I saw stars and almost screamed in pain.
I didn't know whether to be pissed about it or if it was my fault for sticking my finger in there, but I just felt so upset about it all that I almost started crying too.
The somewhat humorous part of all of this was that the young girl checking me out at the register was pregnant, and she was looking at Ezra and I with this look of masked horror. I was that mom. Haha!
So, yeah. A rough day.
To top it all off, I started to think about this leader's retreat we're meant to be going to next weekend, and I'm realizing that Ezra is going to have to be with us due to lack of grandparents within a bajillion mile radius, but Chris and I are both meant to be helping lead worship for the weekend, and how do you successfully do that with a two and a half year old running amok? Hmmm? I started to get all stressed about it for some reason, and I just haven't been able to calm back down. I know it will all work out fine, but if I could just figure out how EXACTLY it will all work out, then maybe I could convince my brain to CHILL OUT ALREADY.
It's been one of those days where you just need a good cry- something to let out all your frustration so that you'll instantly feel much better. But, at the same time, I don't feel like crying. (Perhaps I should go poke my finger in Ezra's mouth again? That'll get me going for sure!)
Also, Chris and I are supposed to practice tonight for an upcoming show with Shannon Horn, (do yourself a favor and CLICK ON THAT LINK. She's sooooo good!) but silly me didn't figure out the babysitting situation in time so now I will probably be stuck at home and not able to practice. Joy of joys. Days like this make me so jealous of the moms and dads who live by their parents. I know moving far away was our choice, but it's ridiculously hard and I just feel... jealous.
Anywho, I'm sorry for my venting post, but I do feel a little bit better after throwing this out there. I'm hoping that after Ezra's nap, things will calm down a bit and we can all just return to our regularly scheduled programming.
*sigh* I could sure go for a Diet Coke right about now. With a splash (or tidal wave) of rum in it.
Ah, well. Water will have to do!
at 4:25 PM