August 16, 2007

Two Songs of Teen Angst.

Joel suggested I put these songs up here- they were written right smack dab in the middle of the (never ending) Chris & Emery saga. Pure teen angst. These two songs speak better about that time than I ever could with type.

I promise that the good, happy posts are just inches away... I know these past, oh I don't know, 300 Chapters or so have been ultra DEPRESSING, and I'm sorry for that, I really am. What can I say? WE WERE ultra depressing for far too long.

Just hold out a little longer, and I promise you will get your happy ending :)

These are super rough recordings- just me and my guitar. Sorry for the low quality, but hopefully you'll get the general idea... enjoy! (?)


"California"

I don't know why it hurts when
I hear you're doing well.
I don't know why I cry when
I see you flash that smile.
I do know that it kills
hearing you disown the sea
with a new heart in your hands and
this old heart trapped in me...

You're running inland, Running inland
scared of facing the ocean's tide.
Running Inland, Running Inland,
I'll catch up to you sometime.

California, California,
You think it's calling out your name
California, California,
You think it's different, but it's the same.

It seems its been so long since
I've been loved by You
Is it just me or was your heart
just craving new?
All I really know is that my heart
it broke in three...
two pieces for you and her,
one piece left in me.


You're running inland, Running inland
scared of facing the ocean's tide.
Running Inland, Running Inland,
I'll catch up to you sometime.

Colorado, Colorado,
You think she's calling out your name
Colorado, Colorado,
You think it's different, but it's the same.



"Circles"

These circles I'm driving are more than nowhere to go.
We said goodbye and 6 months later, I've realized
That I am still standing while you have moved on,
I am still standing here, you have moved on...

Your words stung tonight like the first time
Tonight hurt deeper than the last time.
Your heart looked at me like a stranger
as I smile and say I'll be just fine.

And the part where you said 'I'm sorry'
Hurt more than the angry goodbyes.
It hurt deep, it hurt three years deep-
and made me too angry to cry.

Your watch glancing is in slow motion to me
You're gripped by the hands of time
I think you care for that watch more than you care for me
And I'm sorry for wasting your time.

Your words stung tonight like the first time
Tonight hurt deeper than the last time.
Your heart looked at me like a stranger
as I lie and say I'll be just fine.

And the part where you said 'I'm sorry'
Hurt more than the angry phone calls.
It hurt deep, it hurt three years deep-
and made my big love seem small.

9 comments:

Anna Joy Photography said...

: ( x 3,748

sissy said...

Wow! What a wonderful gift the Lord has given you, to be able to express your life and emotions through words and song! These songs were so moving that I felt as you were singing them I was there with you, all wrapped up with your emotions in the midst of the time...Thanks for sharing!

Misguided Mommy said...

PRETTY SURE I'M GOING TO START BAWLING NOW

Misguided Mommy said...

also depressing is good its drawing us all in....however you must be part pure evil for coming up with these amazing insane cliff hangers..pure torture i tell you

Erin said...

Wow, Emery. Those songs are beautiful and incredibly heart-wrenching; I had no idea you were a musician as well!

Anonymous said...

I haven't commented yet, although I've been reading your story. This may sound really weird because I don't know you or your family, but I follow your blog and what can I say? I think I have idealized your husband beyond words. No kidding, after that anniversary video he made you- I fell for him. Mind you, I am married and love my husband but I thought that your man must have always been PERFECT. It's reassuring to hear that your family is human too. Thanks for sharing.I can't wait to see what happens next!
~meghan beck

Misguided Mommy said...

uggg megan the anniversary video..my husband is still in the dog house for not being that smart

Misguided Mommy said...

post post post post post post

Anna Joy Photography said...

more more more more more! pleeeeeease?