April 12, 2006

What Ezra taught me today.

One of the things I love love love about having a son is the fact that I can be completely undignified and he absolutely eats it up. I've always had a bit of a goofy side, and in the two or three years before I had Ezra, I was noticing that the 'goofy emery' I used to feel so free to be was slowly fading away...

I felt like I was growing up and leaving her behind because "grown-ups don't act that way." Afterall, REAL people don't imitate frogs and praying-mantises in front of their friends, and they certainly don't let those friends take pictures of them while they are imitating frogs and praying-mantises. (Also, REAL people don't play peek-a-boo with large paper bags from Braum's.) We all know this. This is Page 1 in the 'How to be an Adult' handbook.

But Ezra is bringing that part of me back to life.

This must be a big part of why God wants all us stuffy grown-ups to become more like the little whippersnappers in the world. Don't you think? I can only imagine the pleasure God gets when Ezra is vigorously nodding his head to music while trying to walk AND eat an animal cracker all at the same time. If that's not worship, I don't know what is.

I want to learn to be more like Ezra so that I can actually be FREE before God, and not be so worried about what that might look like to everyone else.

I want my 'worship times' to look more like our 'play times' ... where I'm doing all that I can possibly do... (like flailing my arms and legs around while singing songs and making silly faces)... just so I can hear that little laugh that is sweet music to my ears... Just so I can show him that, in that moment, there is nowhere else I'd rather be.


Anne said...

My dear friend...how I miss your face. I really have enjoyed reading your thoughts on learning to be a mommy. You sure have a way with words and it has just brought pure joy to my heart. So please keep them coming. I have also just spent the past 1/2 hour listening to your music while at work...I love it. I am so glad that you have it online so I can hear it. Anyways, I didn't mean to write a book, but I just wanted to say I love you and miss you here in CA.

Cheatwoods said...

i saved all those pictures!!

Candace said...

LOL!!!!! Amen sister....such a reminder to remember our lives as children and imitate that so our cares about how cool we are or who we are impressing!!!! I LOVE IT!!!! I love you for sharing it too!

Cheatwoods said...

time for an update!!!!!!!!!